Starfish

The starfish is a symbol of Ellie’s self-acceptance and the primary vehicle for the theme of Self-Acceptance: Being Comfortable Taking Up Space. It first appears in Poem 30: “I’m a Starfish” and represents an important realization for Ellie. After visiting a plus-size boutique for the first time, she begins to realize that there is a place for her in the world, and that she doesn’t have to change herself to fit others’ expectations.

In “I’m a Starfish,” Ellie likens herself to the creature: “I’m a starfish, / taking up all the room I want” (41). This revelation symbolizes Ellie’s first step toward self-acceptance: She can free herself from others’ desires, such as her mother’s desire for her to lose weight. The line “taking up all the room” in particular recalls the Fat Girl Rules that Ellie opened the novel with, which focus on shrinking herself and taking up as little space as possible (5). The starfish, by contrast, is a radical symbol of something that allows itself to take up space unapologetically. It represents agency and self-acceptance, a stark contrast to the cruel nickname—“whale”—inflicted on Ellie when she was five.

The starfish symbol recurs at key moments to represent Ellie slowly embracing her right to exist.