Where Sleeping Girls Lie

By the start of their second year, Elizabeth and August had been dating for a year, but their relationship was a secret. For August and April Owens, dating was “political,” and Elizabeth didn’t have the social clout to be a good partner. So August kept Elizabeth a secret, and Elizabeth complied out of embarrassment. August liked to take pictures of her, and when photos and videos from those private moments started to circulate around school, he gave her a myriad of excuses. However, Elizabeth worried that the photos would rescind her scholarship. She accused August of sending photos of her to Jude, and August suggested they “take a break” and talk when she was “in a less accusatory mood” (345).

August and Elizabeth’s break became permanent, and she started to notice Jude watching her. She knew it was a bad idea, but Elizabeth started hooking up with Jude to get back at August. She told him August lost her “by being an asshole” (347), which surprised Jude because August was known on the swim team by the nickname “the Gentleman” and often used the initials TG as his signature.

Elizabeth received the invitation to the Hawking party over winter break. The party was lavish but not as fun as Elizabeth had anticipated. Most of the attendees were “popular rich kids” who ignored her (349). She was just about to go home when Jude found her. He brought her a drink and invited her to go somewhere quiet with him. Soon, Elizabeth’s body felt sluggish and heavy. Her vision was hazy, and she couldn’t speak. Jude was on top of her when someone else entered the room. She heard a familiar voice ask what was going on. Elizabeth wanted to ask for help, but she couldn’t move.

The next morning, Elizabeth couldn’t remember what happened. She was plagued by lingering symptoms and spent hours on the internet trying to understand what had happened, finally finding forums full of girls who had experiences identical to her own. Several days after the party, she found herself alone with August during a detention. He accused her of sleeping with Jude, and Elizabeth immediately denied it. However, a memory from the party crept in, sickening her. She rushed out of detention and was crying by the time she reached her room.

Elizabeth reported the rape to Headmaster Webber, who urged her to think about how the accusations could affect her future. He warned that her scholarship could be jeopardized if she attended a Hawking party and reminded her that she had no proof of the assault. Elizabeth left the meeting in a state of “disbelief,” feeling “enraged and small and powerless all at once” (354). Instead, Elizabeth found comfort and understanding in online forums. She even found a comment from a user called PBJam08 that read, “I wish Jude Ripley was dead” (354), and began a correspondence with her. Elizabeth knew boys like Jude would keep hurting other girls if they weren’t stopped, and she became determined to uncover their secrets. She hacked into August’s messaging accounts, discovered the Fishermen’s chat, and began decoding the boys’ usernames. Jude and April were still dating, and Elizabeth moved out of their room to get away from him. April was surprised and hurt, but when Elizabeth tried to tell her that Jude wasn’t “a good person” (356), April accused Elizabeth of having sex with her boyfriend.

Alone in her new room, Elizabeth focused on nothing but her research. Jam, her friend from the forum, had stopped responding to her messages, and Elizabeth missed her and constantly felt alone. By the start of third year, she felt like she had enough information to expose the Fishermen. However, shortly after the school year started, a girl Elizabeth didn’t know called her a slut, claiming she knew Elizabeth was sleeping with her boyfriend after finding a picture of her on his phone. Elizabeth recognized the photo as one she had sent to August. Later, in biology club, she was so distracted that she didn’t notice the class hamster fall out of its cage and die hitting the floor.

Soon, Elizabeth had been able to match every single username in the chat to an ANA student. She was ready to go public, but that day, Miss Blackburn told Elizabeth that her new roommate had arrived and asked her to spend the rest of the day showing Sade around. When Elizabeth saw Sade, however, she was shocked, sure that it was PBJam08 from the forum. When Sade showed no recognition, Elizabeth tried to shake off the likeness and took Sade on a tour of the grounds. As they walked, Elizabeth received an email from her top university choice, saying they had received her letter even though she hadn’t begun the application process yet. Another email followed, warning, “Fuck with us and we fuck with your future” (361), accompanied by an intimate picture of her. She continued receiving threats throughout the day and finally reached out to April, who she hadn’t spoken to in months. They met in the bunker under Franklin House, which had been their secret spot during first year. She confessed that Jude had raped her, and August saw it and did nothing. April left Elizabeth alone in the bunker.

Out of options, Elizabeth texted August to meet at the pool. Just in case, she sent Baz her location along with some emergency sandwich emojis. Both August and Jude were waiting for her. Jude insisted that Elizabeth “wanted it” and “had been making advances […] for weeks” (366). Afterward, she just didn’t want to “face up to the consequences” (366). Furious, Elizabeth pushed Jude away, calling him “a rapist and a coward” (366). Jude seized her by the throat and shoved her against a wall until August pulled him off and punched his friend in the face. As the boys fought, Elizabeth tried to escape, but she fell into the open pit of the new swimming pool, and her head cracked against the tile floor. She heard Jude telling August that they needed to leave Elizabeth there.

Sometime later, Elizabeth woke up in a warm shower, still fully clothed. She could hear April and August arguing. She heard April promise to “sort this out” and “keep [Elizabeth] quiet” before sending August off (368). When April came back to the bathroom, Elizabeth begged her not to send her off, and April insisted she “wasn’t planning to” (368).

Elizabeth tells Sade that April believed her, but Elizabeth was afraid of what would happen if August and Jude found out she was still alive. She insisted on staying hidden in the bunker, but her health continued to deteriorate. Mostly, however, Elizabeth still wanted the Fishermen exposed, so she enlisted April to plant clues for Sade, including the music box and the UV lightbulbs. She was worried that Sade wouldn’t believe her if April had told her directly what Jude was responsible for. Elizabeth also shared her story with the police, prompting them to arrest August for Jude’s murder. She doesn’t think August actually killed his friend, but she knows “he’s far from innocent” and “deserves” whatever punishment he gets (370).

The school board decides against any retribution for the Fishermen boys, arguing that they can’t ruin the boys’ promising futures because of baseless evidence. Jude’s death has turned him into “a saint and victim” (371), and Sade can’t stop thinking about how “boys with everything” “abused the power they so easily wielded” (372).

To stop herself from “spiraling alone,” Sade texts Baz and Persephone, and they convene in Baz’s common room. Looking through NotSoNoble, Sade wonders what they can possibly do to overpower Headmaster Webber and the school board. It occurs to her to create a new part of the website where survivors can anonymously share their stories. She suggests they “outnumber them” and make it impossible to ignore.

By morning, 15 survivors have shared their stories. On Wednesday, Sade and Persephone are shocked to see August free and eating lunch in the cafeteria. He is free because April has confessed to Jude’s murder.

In addition to confessing to Jude’s murder, April also claims to be behind NotSoNoble. Confused as to why she is lying, Baz enlists Kwame to hack the police department’s computers to retrieve the transcript of April’s testimony. April claims that Jude was high at the party and invited her into his room. She thought he wanted to talk and get “closure” on their relationship, but he tried to get back together with her. When he became physical, she “defended [her]self.” The officer notes that April’s hands are too small to match the marks on Jude’s neck, but April claims she was wearing gloves.

It’s clear that April is protecting someone, but Sade doesn’t know who or why. She looks back through the photos in the Fishermen’s chat to find the ones showing April at the Hawking parties. Now that she has seen people under the effect of Rohypnol, she recognizes the signs and sees that April is “barely conscious” in the photos. Someone drugged her too.

The diary anagram “I Sleep, I Drown & Disappear” reads, “April Piper Owens Is Dead” (381).

April is escorted back to school on Friday, and Sade goes to see her. She tells April that she knows Francis used to buy drugs from Jude; she guesses that one of their deals went wrong. Francis got angry and strangled Jude. She also tells April that she knows that Jude drugged and raped her while they were dating. April tells her that she doesn’t know what she is talking about and asks her to leave. On her way out, Sade runs into Francis. He tells Sade that he won’t blame her if she turns him in, but he loves April and would “kill again for [her]” (386). Sade lets it be. She found no sign of Frances in the Fishermen’s chat and believes he is “simply a messed-up asshole who loved his girlfriend” (385).

Elizabeth is released from the hospital but decides to withdraw from ANA. That night, Sade has her usual nightmare about her sister. However, when she wakes up, she is surprised to find Persephone sitting on her bed, offering her a granola bar after missing dinner. Sade slowly realizes she is still dreaming and wakes up properly to find a granola bar and a note from Persephone on her side table. It is the first time since her sister’s death that her nightmare has changed.

Monday morning starts with another assembly, where Headmaster Webber announces that one of the students who created NotSoNoble shared the website with several news outlets, and articles that do not portray ANA in a flattering light are circulating. Luckily, Webber notes, the school has gotten some of the articles taken down “due to [their] contacts,” but the student responsible “will be immediately expelled” (390). He dismisses everyone but Sade.

Sade is expelled, and she texts Baz and Persephone from her room as she packs. Persephone rushes to Turing House, arriving soaking wet and looking close to tears. She asks Sade if she can kiss her. On Tuesday night, Sade spends the evening with Baz and Persephone. After the release of NotSoNoble, there have been a number of articles both in support and defiance of the website; however, the important thing is that they have created a platform “where people can express things they couldn’t before” (393).

On Wednesday morning, Sade is summoned to Miss Blackburn’s office. To her surprise, Miss Blackburn tells Sade that she doesn’t agree with her expulsion and believes what she did was “necessary.” In the wake of the NotSoNoble scandal, the board has asked Headmaster Webber to step down. If Sade keeps her grades up and receives recommendations from her teachers, she can return to ANA the following year. Sade hesitates, wondering if she even wants to return, but then she thinks of her friends and knows she is happy there, despite everything.

A year later, Sade is celebrating Pi Day with Baz and Persephone at ANA. The year has been “a mixed bag of disappointment and triumph” (396). Headmaster Webber has been replaced, and some of the Fishermen were investigated and expelled. However, there are rumors that the remaining boys continue to secretly meet in person. August is finishing his schooling at home, and the murder charges against April were “settled quietly outside of court” (369). Francis was never implicated. Sade was allowed to continue at ANA, and now, in her fourth year, she is the vice-captain of the girls’ swim team. Persephone, her girlfriend, is head girl. Baz and Kwame have also begun dating. Sade is still occasionally consumed by paralyzing grief, but in general, she is “good.” She no longer sees dead bodies in the water when she swims, and she has learned that she isn’t “broken or weak” from her lingering trauma (398). She is “learn[ing] how to live, in spite of it” (398).